An open letter to the discouraged & criticized

If you had ever taken your father’s 30 year hard-earned money and lived through guilty feelings by investing it in something that shall take decades to repay, welcome to my world.

If you had ever sat infront of a banker, with not many collateral documents on hand and yet an intense desire to make a dream come true, welcome to this blog !

If you had ever wanted to try something that you wanted with all your heart and were criticized by a nobody for no reason, then welcome again.

And if you ever had a dream, but were shunned, criticized, scared into not following it - Then welcome to reading this open letter to the discouraged, scared, criticized and pessimists.

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Dear all,

Firstly, this letter is not against any person. Secondly, this is not meant to create a radical change in anyone. And thirdly, this letter is definitely not a wish of how I want people around me transformed.

I, well and truly understand that the world around me is made up of all kinds of people. Just like the different colored threads of a dress is what gives it, its beauty, layers and design - different attitudes of people are needed for a person to make him/her understand various perspectives to life.

But then, when I look back at the 25 years of my life – there was a time I was tired. There was a time, I was getting fed up. There was a time, when i was getting irritated at how most people are in a default mode to kill others’ dreams. Of how they used words, looks, gossipy comments, an uneasy silence and ultimately sheer indifference to signal what they think of dreamy pursuits. I was fuming at the thought of how others smirk and derive sadistic pleasure in portraying the sense of impossibility in another person’s desires. I felt like screaming at how people could scare a family and confine them to within houses for the thought of risking peace in life. I felt like a sinner for having an attitude to go beyond what others’ thought was my limit.

But what can a powerless, lower middle-class Indian like me do in such situations ? Shouting back with words would mean “I am arrogant and headstrong”. Giving up would mean “killing a part of life within me”. Asking them to give me the time to prove myself would mean “facing skepticism” till I achieve it. And avoiding them would mean “living like an outcast”.

Any of the above options would only end up with me being hurt and demotivated. It would leave me feeling discouraged, scared, criticized and pessimistic. So, what is the way out of all this ? In fact, is there a way out ?

A simple and straight forward answer to it is “NO, THERE IS NO WAY OUT OF THIS !”

Honestly, after years of arroganly trying to follow my heart, I realize that it is none of other people’s business to support you blindly. It is wrong of you to even expect it. It is too much to expect people to unconditionally offer you kind words, encouragement, time and means for you to progress. It is impossible to make them stop talking about their skeptical perspectives of what you are doing. Also, societies do not tolerate people who run the risk of trying to be different while disturbing the harmony within themselves, their family and of people around them.

Then, how do we go about managing such trying times ? How do we dream, be crazy to go after our dreams and yet not run the risk of attracting evil attention ?

In my view, the best way to live life is to not counter but expect evils to live with you for every step and forever. In fact, I would treat them as necessary ! That is what shall add value to your efforts in the long run. People’s expression of your dreams’ impossibility and your striving to make your dreams a reality is what will make a meaningful life and the inspiring story. Life, nature and actions all live in duality. For every dream, there shall and must be an opposition. It is your responsibility to expect it, respect it and not give up in front of it. It is your responsibility to fight it, live with it and travel the distance. It is your responsibility to go take the past scars, present wounds and future hurt in order to live your dreams. It is the price you pay for attempting to be different from people and selfishly live for what your heart wants.

So, the next time, when people say you are wasting time in doing unnecessary things in life, just remember “When you are doing what your heart truly wants, you are never ever wasting time !”

When people say “you are just being arrogant, careless and egoistic”, just remember “When you are doing what your heart wants, you are living life in the way you want and for the purpose you want. It is not being egoistic. It is caring for the only soul who’d always be with you – your heart”

When people say “When you can be calm and peaceful as the person you are, why do you take risks and be troubled”, just remember, “Risks bring immediate troubles. Troubles, when triumphed or even when failed, bring meaning to life. And the ultimate purpose of life is to add meaning to the time we have been given. Not to just remain peaceful. If being peaceful is the only purpose of life, even the lazy sloth is calm and peaceful. That does not mean the insect has led the best life on the planet !”

When people say “I foretold you would fail and see I was right”, just remember “It is never a question of others being right or wrong. It is a question of you being human ! Of listening to your heart. Of living for it. Of telling times and people to come that you lived life on your terms. Of telling yourself that you have faith in what your voice has to say. Of telling god that you never underestimated the ability of his creation.”

And finally, regardless of what people have to say, just remember, when you are heart screams for you to go after your dreams, you better go after it ! People will have a lot of things to say. That is their job. But your heart has only one thing to say. It is your job !

With affectionate regards,

A fellow trier in making my dreams come true,

Sai Prasad Vishwanathan.